Think Babies are Expensive? Here are 10 Ways They Save you Money!

Baby ToyThe number one reason couples say they’re holding off on starting a family is because they aren’t financially prepared to bring a new little person into the world. And that makes perfect sense. You want the best for your future family, so you want to be ready to provide for them financially. And, of course, the statistics going around right now certainly aren’t helping the matter. In fact, an economic and business research study just reported that to get your child to 21, it will cost you an average of £229,251.  Now that is a staggering amount of money for any parent to spend!

However, as always, we at BB4BM have decided to do a little research and look at the financial upside to having a baby. In fact, we’ve discovered a few ways that your little bundle of joy will save you quite a lot. Maybe not £229,251, but enough to take away a little bit of the sting. So, here are 10 ways that babies save you money!

*Disclaimer: This is a humor piece, so please don’t take any of it too seriously…

1. Alcohol

That’s right! When you have a baby, you will no longer have to spend the vast amount of money you used to spend on alcohol. Not only will mothers have to swear it off completely during pregnancy, but once the little one comes along, you won’t want to deal with a hangover AND a screaming baby. So, put away your margarita maker and just watch your savings add up!

2. Toiletries

Sure, you’ll have to pay a bucket load of money for diapers and baby products, but since you’ll no longer be spending loads of money on your own toiletries, the spending and saving will match up. You won’t have much time for showers, so your shower gel will last twice as long. And when you’re only using a toothbrush once a day (or every other day), toothbrushes and toothpaste last a lot longer. And the dozens of pounds you used to spend getting waxed or buying razors? Not even an issue. You probably won’t see your legs for years, so why bother?

3. Beauty Supplies

These kind of go hand-in-hand with toiletries, but beauty supplies are much more expensive, so you’ll be saving even more by cutting these out of your budget. If you don’t have time to shower, you definitely don’t have time to do your hair or makeup. In fact, by the time your little bundle of joy is old enough to walk, you’ll probably have a cupboard full of expired makeup and hair products that don’t look like they should. And just like that, you’ve saved yourself more money!

4. Clothes

Once you have your baby, all you’ll need is a few pairs of yoga pants, a pair of oversized sweat pants, and a couple t-shirts. Every other piece of clothing you have will be placed in a safe place, where baby fluids can’t get to them. And forget about going to the store to spend hundreds of pounds buying new sets of clothes for every season. You’ll barely notice the seasons are changing, much less that styles are changing.

Even if you go back to work, your wardrobe will consist of clothes that can hide the aforementioned baby fluids, because who really has time to change twice before running out the door to work? Don’t worry, though. Not buying clothes for the next 18 years will get you even closer to reaching that £229,251 goal.

5. Cleaning Supplies

If you think your house is a mess now, you’re in for a huge surprise. Sure, the first few weeks you’re back from the hospital, you might try to stay on top of a few chores. But once the screaming escalates and you haven’t slept in three days, the dirty dishes in the sink and the un-vacuumed floors will be minor issues. All you’ll need is a few Clorox wipes and you’ll be good for the next decade or so. It’s not like you’ll be doing much entertaining at home, anyways. So sit back and watch those savings roll in!

6. Home Decorations

Not only will you not have to clean your house, but you’ll also never have to decorate ever again. That vase that was a wedding gift from your grandmother? Shattered into a million pieces. Your favorite rug that you saved up for months to purchase? A disgusting shade of brown that you just don’t recognize. Soon you’ll realize that you should just let it go for now and deal with it in a couple years.

7. Expensive Dinners

Remember how we mentioned you won’t be drinking anymore? Well, not only are your nights out at the bar off the table, so are your more classy nights out with friends. Not only will you have no energy to get yourself ready, pinning down a babysitter is an entirely different struggle. Don’t even get us started on how, when you do get a chance to get away, you’ll be happier taking a quick nap in your quiet car. Who needs expensive dinners anyways, right?

8. Movies, TV, Books, etc.

You won’t have a lot of time on your hands once you’re in charge of keeping an adorable little human alive. You might be able to catch a few minutes of your favorite TV series before you fall into a deep sleep, but even that’s pushing it. And forget about going out to see the latest James Bond. That would require getting dressed and finding a babysitter, two things we’ve already mentioned are pretty hard. Reading will be a precursor to sleep, unless it’s the hundreds of baby blogs and baby magazines subscriptions you have. Even that has to be done over little ones’ head.

9. Lingerie

It’s not happening.

10. Travel

We all dream of taking our children on educational trips across the country. They’ll sit in the back reading their books while we drive down the highway listening to Chopin. And then you wake up and there are thousands of potty breaks, screaming, and constant ‘are we there yet’. And if you’re thinking of flying, then you should probably start saving now. Airlines don’t care how small your little one is, they need a chair of their own. So, instead of going on your dream vacations, you can sit at home watching the Discovery Channel. And that will save you big time!

Yes, having a child is hard work. And, yes, this was a silly piece. But, it should serve as a reminder that what parents do is extremely difficult. This is part of the reason we do what we do here at BB4BM. We want to do everything we can to make life just a little bit easier. We appreciate your hard work. And, no matter how hard it is to raise little ones, we all know it’s so worth it in the end.

What is the Verdict?

MoneySavingPigDo you have anything further to add?  We love feedback so please use the comment section below.

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